Remember the days of Emily Post's Good Etiquette? What to do when, to follow all the rules of courtesy which means Women and Children first. When a ship is sinking and abandoned, the rafts and life preservers are saved for the women and children first, to value our wives and respect the longevity of our children as inheritors of our estates, to put the valued people in a position of respect. The Captain goes down with his ship.
Is there an eldest son or daughter, to receive their parents' money in their Will and Testament first, before the younger siblings? Not old fashioned, still an important rule, a Commandment from The Torah that the eldest is the one to inherit.
Help your children earn their college diplomas, this means financial as well as emotional encouragement. Take care of your elderly parent, this also means financial help if they need it, and also emotional assistance for them. These, yes, are rules in The Torah, families must care for each other.
On a train or a bus? Is there an elderly person who is standing not sitting? Give up your seat and give it to them. Even if you are there first, if you are able to stand but they are not, give up your seat so they can be comfortable. A woman but not elderly? Still, give up your seat, this is good etiquette.
I remember my Father would wrap my Mother's coat and sweater around the shoulders of my Mother, his wife, so she did not have to muss or fuss; he gently and caringly covered her with this warmth of her clothing. We were at a restaurant and about to leave, and he made sure she was covered, warm and protected. My Mother loved his attentions and his courtesies towards her! He also would pleasingly keep track of my Grandma's eyeglasses, saying "Mother, don't forget them!"
Yes, it takes love to propel this machine that is called "family and friends" and this love comes from our beloved worship of the ONE ALL-Mighty G-D. It is He Who shows us the way, the direction, and how to use lovingkindness in our deeds, speech, and thoughts.
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