I have returned my soul to Judaism--the religion of my father--my rest on a dreamy-eyed Shabbat is now complete rest. My chant is no longer broken--it is innate within me and therefore peace is near me and in me and with this blog I want to share this peace with you.
Last night was a Friday night in the Sanctuary and G-d's loving hand gently closed my eyes in Hebrew chant. I am in love with Adonai--Adonai is my Beloved. Adonai, You formed me and made me to look exactly the way You look. I cannot believe how perfect I must be if I am made to look like You. I want to carry out Your plans for me, my Creator, to share the stories of King David--of my family--with all people--as I am his great great great.... grand-daughter. King David had a slingshot and he killed Goliath with one pebble. He wrote the Psalms and was a musician--he led the Israelites in battle. G-d's mighty arm guided a small pebble that killed a giant. G-d's protective nature also guides me at all times protecting me with the sounds of peace and my pebble is a "tsur shel ahavah"--a rock of love--my hands are guided by Adonai to create loving words on this blog--these words are my pebbles and will slay dragons and kill giants--the words of love and peace will put them all to sleep like I also sleep on Shabbat. Through perceiving my peace--one can find his/her peace as well. These words of peace and lovingkindness will show people how to live in love and honor. Great masses of people will see it is love and kindness and that will defeat the enemy and put an end to all that is not good--all that is not good will be put to sleep and awake with a new dawn after feeling rest and see the light, the sunshine, of gratitude of one's lot, and performing good deeds for his/her fellow human being.
Binah and chochma--understanding and wisdom--are like a "tsur shel ahavah" a rock of love. Not a sculpture--but a stable continual flow of lovingkindness that becomes as strong as a rock--the rock is the love of G-d, the love of oneself, the love of one's family unit, the love of one's synagogue or church, the love of the community and of one's friends.
The Sefirot nurtures me in a kind and trustful way--naturally balancing me to integrate myself. I see beauty and hear sweet sounds and smell fragrances and touch softness and then think wisdom. I love all things. My soul has these inherited characteristics because I have the DNA of King David--like he, I love music and song and words that praise G-d for this love I give and have received. Every Shabbat is a joy--and I will share my Shabbat rest with you and then you too will have a blessing.
I love natural water--this is why I love rain--it is cleansing, purifying, refreshing. And I love fire because of the beautiful glow of Shabbat candles; and strong stable earth--which is the architectural building of the synagogue that gives me a place to rest and shelter where I connect with G-d and my fellow Israelites. Air makes me holy when it is clean and smoke-free air--if I smell smoke--I remember the sacrifices in the Temples to Adonai--burning and consecrating. When I appreciate these elements and merge with them I can love and desire all things and all life that is good.
I try to find the light in everything--there is goodness and G-dliness in all places. My life has meaning--my life means to share my meaning with all people: the meaning of my great great great... grandfather King David's Psalms--which are meant to warn Jews of evil and not participate in it--to not worship multiple false gods. The Psalms however are for all people, Jews and non-Jews. King David was a man who had a Jewish father with a grandmother on his father's side who was a convert to Judaism--she was Ruth--my aunt's name was Ruth Ginsburg. David had Jewish enemies and Philistine enemies and Moabite enemies, etc. His mother's religion is unknown to us. It is not recorded in the Tanakh--some say she was Jewish and some say she was not. I for one, believe she was not a Jew. If she was a Jew, this would have been recorded in the Tanakh. David's mother's religion is unknown, a mystery. My mother like perhaps, King David's mother too, is not a Jew. She is a dear and loving person and without Judaism as her religion. My father loved her and married her even though he broke a rule and married out of his religion. Our family is composed of Jews and Catholics and we all love each other dearly. My father in creating this peace between Catholics and Jews through the family unit could very well be the Messiah--he created a family of supposed natural enemies, who all love each other dearly. Anyone could be the Messiah, I could be the Messiah or you could be the Messiah or yes, my father could be the Messiah. The prophesy is that the Messiah will be a descendant of King David.
The descendants of our family will all be descendants of King David like my father and like me. King David, my great, great, great...grandfather was the greatest peacemaker of all people: of all Jews, Christians, Muslims, Buddhists, etc. He believed in warning people of evils so we would be prepared and not upset when an evil occurrence would happen. We could expect to be terrorized and therefore not terrorized. My family is one of peace--Jews and Catholics who all love each other--we expect the worse--and the worse happens, but we as King David's descendants know to make lemonade out of lemons.
I have shared my life in my writing with all people--I have 100 articles about my life in a blog at www.bethginzberg.blogspot.com. All people are G-d’s creations, and I, as a Jewish convert, am chosen by Adonai to love all G-d's creations. I am also chosen to lead through example; to carry G-d's message which is to live righteously; and then to influence all people with this righteous behavior. This is what it means to be "chosen." I love life and I love all my choices--G-d chose me. I am chosen to make the right choices--this is what I am chosen for. All my choices are guided by Adonai and therefore in the end will all be a blessing. I see signs and wonders that G-d shows me--I am able to visualize imaginary images and draw them on paper, and see real everyday sights--sights of musical instruments, perfumes, holy ritual Jewish clothing, books, kind smiles on people's faces: sights of beauty that bring love into my heart; and I often hear G-d's voice, not as a hallucination, but through the kind words other people say to me. It is all very good. I know now how to sharpen my senses to perceive goodness and dull them to pain or struggle or boredom. I love my Jewish lifestyle and will keep it so I can continue to praise Adonai with it. I love walking with strength, trying to be steady, balanced, and sure.
Peace of mind is the goal. My fingernail was shining from the bright orange light of the Havdalah candle last night--and G-d willing: it will be a shavua tov: a good week--I am inspired to write this blog to you and hope you will breathe in my words if they can help you: like fresh air. Air that is actually over 5,000 years old but still can keep us healthy and joyous even today. Air like the spirits of our ancestors never disappears. Oxygen is renewed constantly and plants breathe in carbon dioxide and synthesize it as their food; but the spirits of our ancestors are still with us today in this air that circulates from the heavens.
On Sukkot, a Jewish holiday, we celebrate our ancestors: both the Matriarchs and the Patriarchs, and on Halloween, we bring back spirits too. Dead leaves like spirits are flying everywhere from Trees of Life; and birds are flocking together and flying to warmer climates in expectation of freezing weather. If we expect disappointment, as David warns us, we will not be disappointed. The idea is to be prepared at all times for the worse: for the winter months. As "Women of Valor"--we clothe our families in crimson woolen garments in preparation for the cold. To make hard times easier times--it is best to always have an alternative route. One's humble abode can be a bed of flowers--a Garden of Eden. It is your choice and the result of your efforts. I believe my table is fit for a King--for the family of the descendants of King David. Come and eat my words of wisdom with me and profit from the nourishment! There are only 613 Commandments, there could be more! There could be 614, but not. So: have gratitude, intention, and hope; and then you will eat well. Bon appetit!
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