Strumming on an old guitar in your mind, creating music to oneself as you await. Trying to wait patiently. Not to psyche yourself into bad news. Not to imagine the worse. An elderly parent you are caring for as you phone them regularly and they answer the phone because they know it is you. Dialing their number again and again. No answer. Waiting and wondering. Whispering to every spirit you know. In bed taking a nap and dreaming about them and their welfare. Entangled. Wishing to be there for them if they need you. Seniors. Not aged. Wise. Not old.
Giving God full reign as He is the only One Who can soothe your pains. Relieve your anxiety. A God you call upon to calm your nerves. Trying in this relationship with God Himself to bring Angels into this dilemma. We are second only to Angels.
Standing on one foot and leaning on the other, as we do during the Amidah. Knowing that there is nothing else we can do except to talk to God and ask Him to be there with you as your Companion and to protect your elderly parent or whoever it is that you are worried about.
God? Are you there? Can you save me and everyone I love? Can you descend from your throne in the clouds onto Earth and help me to stay alive and help all of my loved ones to stay alive as well?
It is in Your Hands, Lord, thank you, toda rabba, for all You do to help me and to help my Family.
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